Start With You: The Morning Ritual That Changed Everything
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from some of the most grounded, happy, and honestly just on it women I know, it's this: how you start your morning sets the tone for everything. And no, I’m not talking about some super aesthetic, perfectly color-coded 5am routine with celery juice and journaling under a Himalayan salt lamp (although if that’s your vibe, I love that for you). I’m talking about something way simpler, and way more powerful: finding one small thing that fills your tank before the world starts asking things of you. Let me take you back to when this all really clicked for me.
From Chaos to Clarity
There was a time not too long ago when my mornings were total chaos. I’d wake up already feeling behind. The second my eyes opened, it was emails, notifications, noise. I was instantly in go-mode—checking off tasks, responding to messages, rushing through breakfast, if I even remembered to eat. It felt like the day was running me before I even had a chance to catch my breath. And honestly? It wore me down. I was doing a lot, but I wasn’t doing any of it with intention. I felt reactive. Disconnected. Exhausted. Then I started noticing a pattern in the women I admire—friends, mentors, even creators I follow online. The most grounded, energized, magnetic women weren’t necessarily the ones with the most hours in the day. They were the ones who protected their mornings. Not because they had extra time, but because they knew how precious those first few minutes are. They weren’t waking up and diving headfirst into the noise. They were starting slow. With purpose. With intention. With themselves.
The Power of a Simple Morning Ritual
Here’s what I learned: you don’t need two hours. You don’t need to wake up before the sun. You don’t need a perfectly curated ritual that looks good on Instagram. You just need one thing. One small, grounding ritual that signals to your body, your mind, and your soul: I matter. I’m here. I’m starting this day with me. For me, that’s usually movement. Just 30 to 45 minutes of a short workout or a walk. It clears the mental clutter. It gets my blood flowing. It reminds me I have a body, a breath, a pulse—that I’m alive and capable and ready. Some days, it’s journaling. Other days, it’s coffee in silence, just sitting with my thoughts. Sometimes it’s prayer. Sometimes it’s music and a quick dance in the kitchen. It doesn’t matter what it is. It matters why you do it. And the why is this: to fill your tank before the world pulls at you.
The Science Backs It Up
What’s wild is that there’s actual research backing this up. Psychologists have found that the first 30 minutes of your day are crucial for your mental state. In those moments, your brain is operating in theta and alpha waves, which makes you more receptive to suggestion and emotional influence. In other words, how you feel and what you do first thing in the morning deeply affects your mindset for the rest of the day (source: Psychology Today). In fact, a study published in the journal Emotion found that people who experienced positive emotions early in the day were more likely to report higher levels of productivity and well-being later in the day. Another study from the University of Nottingham and the National Institute of Education in Singapore found that willpower is strongest in the morning and decreases throughout the day. So if you want to build a habit that sticks, the morning is the best time to plant those seeds.
So What Does This Look Like in Real Life?
Let me be real: I am not perfect with this. Life happens. Schedules shift. Hormones fluctuate. Kids get sick. Deadlines pile up. I don’t wake up every morning feeling like a sunrise meditation queen. But I try. And that effort has changed everything. The difference is night and day. When I protect my mornings—even just 10 minutes—I feel more:
Centered
Focused
Clear-headed
Present
Calm
Me
It’s like a little boundary I draw around myself to say, "Before I give anything to the world today, I’m going to give something to myself." And over time? That little ritual becomes a rhythm. That rhythm becomes a habit. And that habit becomes a foundation.
What If You’re Not a Morning Person?
I hear this all the time: "But I’m not a morning person." Okay, cool. You don’t have to wake up at 5am. But could you carve out 5 minutes before you check your phone? Could you give yourself one song’s worth of time to breathe and stretch? Could you sip your coffee in quiet instead of while scrolling Instagram? It doesn’t have to be big. It just has to be yours.
Start Where You Are
Maybe your ritual is lighting a candle and writing three things you’re grateful for. Maybe it’s stepping outside and feeling the sun on your face. Maybe it’s prayer. Or affirmations. Or reading one page of a book that speaks to your soul. Whatever it is, start small. Start messy. Start imperfect. Just start for you. Because when you begin your day with intention, you set the tone for everything that follows. And here’s the truth: You are worthy of starting your day grounded, centered, and full. Not depleted. Not distracted. Not already behind. You don’t have to be reactive to your life. You can be the one setting the rhythm.
My Challenge to You
If your mornings feel chaotic, I challenge you to try this:
Choose one simple ritual.
Make it something you look forward to.
Give yourself just 5–10 minutes.
Do it before checking your phone or diving into responsibilities.
And then see how the rest of your day feels. This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being present. You deserve a life that feels intentional, not accidental. You deserve a morning that grounds you. You deserve to start with you.
-Kiley
